What Do You See?

Red and yellow and pink and green,

Purple and orange and blue,

I can sing a rainbow,

Sing a rainbow,

Sing a rainbow too!

-The Rainbow Song by Delta Goodrem

Remember that song? I have no idea where I heard it or at what age, but upon finishing reading The Giver by Lois Lowry, it’s all I could think about. I set out in the early morning hours, immediately after reading, to walk the boston terrier that I was caring for at the time. A beautiful sunny day that felt more like spring than autumn, I found myself more aware of my surroundings than usual. I’ve never seen the sky as blue as it was that day or heard the birds in singing as loudly in the trees. What would my existence be like if I lived in “Sameness” and not “Elsewhere”? Thrust into a job for the rest of my life, not knowing love or sadness, I’d become a robot. Sometimes I do feel like I’m going through the motions of life, but it’s nothing like Jonas experienced.

I’ve always been a bit rebellious in spirit. This manifests mostly in my opinions and outspoken nature. While I’m a terrible decision-maker, the idea of not having choices infuriates me as it does Jonas: “If everything’s the same, then there aren’t any choices! I want to wake up in the morning and decide things!” (97) Jonas gains wisdom from the Giver that allows him to see the beauty and value of free will. It’s simply the ability and dignity of having a choice that’s important. Then I think about how much we take for granted each day – how many places people can’t choose what they want to each for breakfast simply because there isn’t any breakfast that day and how many places religious freedom feels like a myth. Of course rules, laws, and schedules govern how people live, but they’re not meant to suck the emotion out of life. People still feel and hear and see and taste and touch.

By the end of The Giver, I was distressed. Five days later and I’m still unsure about what I feel or what to say. My head is swirling with questions spurred by Jonas’ questions to his mentor. What does it mean to love? Is that a generalized term that has become meaningless over time? Life is precious – am I valuing the moments as I should or getting swept up in the busyness? In Sameness, they don’t know the meaning of the word emotion. Do I express how I feel too much or not enough? We try to protect our children from wrong choices but does society stifle their freedom of expression and ability to be unique? I desperately want to contribute something worthwhile to the world. My favorite quotation is from Ghandi – “Be the change you wish to see in the world” and I try to live that way. I was raised a “giver”, not of memories, but of myself and my heart. My mom is the most tremendous giver I know. But, the idea is that everyone has a job to do in the world. What is mine? It’s not as if when I turn 29 in a few months, that there’ll be a Job Assignment Ceremony for all of the Twenty-Nines. The questions are endless and perhaps so is the book.

The ending of The Giver is openended and worthy of being interpreted as the reader sees fit. Either Jonas and Gabriel sailed through the snow to Elsewhere, a place with a roaring fire, Christmas lights, joyful family, and love - or - they froze to death on their journey beyond Sameness, and Elsewhere was simply another name for life after death. Mina, a character in Skellig by David Almond says that we need to accept that which we cannot know and use our imagination. For me, I’d rather I didn’t know the author’s intent at the close of The Giver. The unsettled feeling I have tells me that I NEED to think deeply about the ending and explore why this book is incredibly profound and moving for me. I already have a line of 6 people waiting to read it. I’ll be interested to hear what kind of colors they’re seeing by the end.